Fishy Chronicles 79: The Webs We Weave (11) – Breaking point (cont'd)

I spent the next day watching and following my cousin Sarah everywhere.

I felt a sense of foreboding but didn’t have anything concrete with which to go to my parents. People sneaking out of their homes with a knapsack in the middle of the night (FC 78) was a cause for worry, but this far along into our family vacation I felt any adult interference only led to complications. Adults misunderstood things and made no effort to sort out matters satisfactorily… especially for the wronged parties.

Now, when I think of my younger self, I know I was a puerile idiot. At that time I thought I saw things others didn’t. In a sense I did, because all I seemed to be doing was watching others and wanting to be accepted.

I knew Sarah was exasperated with me and, at one point, shoved me. I was so infuriated I pinched her upper arm and sprinted away. I cursed myself for what I did, because it made following her harder. By afternoon I got tired of being an altruistic detective and stopped tailing Sarah. I swallowed my lunch, washed my plate and disappeared before Ammachi began to worry herself looking for things for me to do. I had done enough chores for a lifetime this vacation!

I slipped into the backyard and went to my spot under the guava tree at the side of the house. People rarely came this way, which was why it was my favourite spot. I tucked Romeo, the rooster, under my armpit, kissed his head several times, squeezed him until he squawked a warning, and leaned on the low wall that ran around my grandfather’s house and its courtyard. I had a vantage point here – there were no other exits out of the courtyard except for the side gate and the front gate. From under the guava tree I was camouflaged and had a view of both gates.

Early in the morning, when people were just waking up, I had gone to the spot I had seen Sarah go to in the middle of the night (FC 78) and, after poking several mounds of earth and dead leaves with a long stick, found her knapsack hidden under some coconut leaves. I was hesitant to touch it at first because usually there were snakes hidden under such dead-leaf stacks. The knapsack held clothes, rolled tightly into wads, a pair of shoes and slippers.

I waited. And waited.

Sometime after lunch, when people begin to take naps and the village becomes very quiet because even the birds are taking their siesta, I heard the sound of footsteps coming from the kitchen side. I scrambled to paste myself against the wall of the house. I heard the latch of the small side gate squeak and peeped from behind a wall. Sarah was gently moving the latch up, down and backwards. She closed the gate behind her, but didn’t bother latching it. She crossed the field at the side of the house, walking straight to where she had hidden her backpack. Sarah was carrying a small black holdall. When I raised my head to look over the wall, she was dragging her backpack out from under the coconut leaves. She walked to the sagging portion of the barbed wire fence surrounding the field, put her backpack and holdall on the side of the road and climbed over.

She hefted the backpack on her shoulders, grabbed the holdall and began to walk towards the junction. I jumped over the side gate and ran through the field, carefully negotiating the barbed wire fence – I had torn my clothes a couple of times previously. I had thought through this somewhat. First I had debated writing my parents a note, but then thought better of it in case I had read Sarah wrong. Now I wish I had written that note.

In any case, I had come prepared. In my pavada* pocket my purse held a princely 700 rupees – cash gifts I received the previous year. I followed Sarah to the small bus stop near the junction. The shop keepers watched her for a little while and then gave up. I crept closer and tried to hide behind the pole holding up the corrugated tin roof of a makeshift shop, but then thought the better of it and walked up to Sarah.

She looked startled and I felt momentary elation that I had shaken her composure. “Go home," she said coldly.

“Why?”

“You’re out alone and your parents will worry.”

“I’m not alone.”

“Oh?”

“I’m with you,” I smiled at my oversmartness but stepped back in fear when she darted towards me.

“Go home, you idiotic child!”

I felt hurt at the namecalling. Too bad for Sarah. Now I was going to stick to the plan and see where she was going. I sat on the rough concrete step of a nearby shop and looked at the road towards my home.

“Didn’t you hear me!” Sarah shouted. I looked at Sarah from the corner of my eye. She was in a state – bright pink cheeks and eyes ready to spring out of her face. It didn’t help that every passing man ogled at her.

“Stop fussing, mol. Your parents will worry when they can’t find you.”

“I left a note saying I was with you.” 

My cousin was too fast for me – she was now shaking me by my arms. “Go… back… home!” she said through clenched teeth.

“Sure.” Sarah stopped shaking me. “But you have to come too.” I pulled myself out of her grasp and she looked around for a stick. I lifted a small stone and rolled it towards her feet.

I thought she would beat me for my audacity. She took a deep breath and her mouth moved. Maybe she was praying… or swearing. She went back to the bus stop and stared unseeingly at the shops on the other side of the road. I desperately wanted to run across to the shop next door and call my parents, but the odds of my cousin disappearing into any bus were high. And what would I say to my parents. I dreaded the trouble my cousin would get into if she were found out. Plus… she would never forgive me.

Buses trundled back and forth. “Which bus are you looking for, Chechi?”

“None of your business.”

“I’m getting on that bus with you.”

“YOUuuu…” Her hand rose, and fell, as a shadow loomed over us. Johnny’s eyebrows were raised and there was a crooked smile on his face.

I tried to smile, but I was embarrassed at being publicly humiliated... again. I had a crush on Johnny and my face flamed. I felt a finger under my chin.

“Aww, don’t worry. Sarah’s already sorry for what she was going to do. Believe me, she won’t sleep well tonight,” Johnny chuckled, instantly making us smile with him. “Where are you going, Sarah?”

“Er, mm,” Sarah mumbled. I felt annoyed at her for still trying to keep me in the dark, but she seemed backed into a corner with Johnny watching.

“What?” he asked.

She threw me a dirty look and leaned closer to Johnny to whisper in his ear.

“Careful, Chechi, people may think you’re trying to kiss Johnnycha,” I muttered.

The pause was electric and Sarah sprang back and Johnny guffawed, slapping his thigh. Sarah burst out. “See what I’m dealing with! See! Not a peaceful moment in that house. No privacy whatsoever. Who wouldn’t want to run away!”

“I offered to come with you, but you got angry,” I was keen to meet Sarah’s grandparents in Angamali. They had a menagerie and grew exotic fruits in their backyard. They were enormously interesting.

“You haven’t told your parents!” Sarah spluttered.

“Nothing a phonecall can’t sort. They’ll know I’m safe with you,” Sarah snorted. “But,” I continued, “that’s not the real reason you’re running away.”

Sarah opened her mouth, looked at Johnny and closed it. “You are an insolent child. Insolent. Oof!”

“No name calling, please.”

“You are the most infuriating child in that-that-that household!” she jabbed the air furiously in the direction of my grandfather’s house. She looked crazed – red faced, with her head shaking madly and trying not to froth at the mouth. Surely I wasn’t the worst child in the house.

“Didn’t you say the boys were worse… and needed to be hung on the trees and thrashed at regular intervals?” Johnny said, instantly winning my admiration.

“Where are you going, Sarah?” Johnny asked, firmly this time.

His look was so intense that Sarah blurted, “Angamali.”

“Your grandparents’ place. You didn’t say you were going.”

“Er, sudden change of plans.”

He pulled out the rolled up Malayalam newspaper sticking out of Sarah’s bag and looked at the crossword. “The rumour is that you’re meeting someone tomorrow.”

This village was smaller than a pin prick in the universe, but if a secret had to be kept it was. But how did Johnny know! The suitor’s impending visit was a state secret – no one other than the immediate family knew. None of us dared to discuss it with our cousins next door in case Sarah tracked us down and beat us to death for revealing her public shame. It was strange Sarah felt this way because all our other cousins were dying to get married and were just waiting to graduate from college. They collected soft toys, cuddled random babies, tried on their mothers’ new saris and jewellery and strutted about imagining they were coy brides – all of which made me want to vomit.

Sarah looked like a storm about to erupt. “I was not consulted in the matter. I see no reason to meet this person.”

“Oh,” Johnny looked surprised. “Wouldn’t it be better to just meet the boy?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because… er... because most of my cousins who did… married the first guy they met!”

“That’s not good?”

“Of course not! They’ve not studied further. Most are housewives. They are up to their ears in soiled napkins and cooking. They were capable of much more… only if they were given the chance!”

“So marriage has ruined their lives?”

“Er… um. No,” Sarah said, looking unhappy at conceding the point. Our cousins who married early hadn’t complained about their lot. They always looked excited and content.

“Do you have a pen?” Johnny asked.

“What?”

“A pen… to do the crossword.” Johnny smiled. Sarah rummaged through her bag and finally located a pen.

Johnny fished out some money from his pocket and held it out. “Go and get us some puffs, mol,” he looked at the bakery nearby.

I reached for the note, but my hand stopped in mid air. If I went across to buy the puffs and Sarah got on a bus… Maybe it was a ploy. Johnny did have a soft corner for Sarah. “Er, no. Thanks. I’m not hungry.”

A look of surprise crossed his face. No one could resist meat puffs and here I was saying I didn’t want any. The note he was holding out could buy several puffs. “Oh. Ok, mol. Could you get some for Sarah and me? Please?”

I was torn. I backed away and shook my head. I felt Sarah’s exasperated breath against my cheek, “You’re being rude, mol. Go and get the puffs.”

“No. I’m quite certain you’ll get on a bus while I’m buying the puffs. And…” I looked at Johnny but didn’t say ‘… I think Johnnycha will help you run away’.

Sarah gasped and was about to say something, probably rude, but Johnny moved into us, splitting us apart. “You have a point, mol. I didn’t think of that. I must say, I never took you for a quitter, Sarah. Come, mol, help me with the crossword while we wait for Sarah’s bus. Though I dread to think of the state your parents will be in when they discover you have disappeared. Did you leave them a note, Sarah?” He looked at her so strangely. He wasn’t annoyed or anything, but still such a strange look.

“Er, no, no…” Sarah looked embarrassed and rushed on, “er, b-but I was going to call them when I reached… Anga-mali.”

“Hmm. Still, I rather took you for someone who’d stand her ground and fight for what she thought was right. I imagine…” he rotated his head, thinking, his eyes staring into the distance.

“Imagine what?” I prodded.

He roused himself and grinned. “Oh, I imagine that your Appachan and Georgiechyan would have come around to your chechi’s point of view given time. They seem like reasonable men.”

“You don’t know them at al..” Sarah hit the back of my head to shut me up. I whirled around to protest but Johnny grabbed my arm and pulled me near him. He folded the newspaper into a thick square. “Let’s see if we can solve this crossword,” he pointed at the first clue.

My lower lip must have hit my navel because Johnny said, “You don’t know Malayalam?”  

“No.”

“Sarah?”

Sarah sighed and stood closer to Johnny. He scribbled some words at the side of the box and looked at Sarah. He wrote more words.

“You’ve got to put the words in the boxes,” I poked the empty white spaces of the crossword with my index finger.

“Yeah. Those were my suggestions. Maybe Sarah can come up with the right answer.” He gave her the pen.

She looked confused, but took the pen from him. After a long time thinking, she scribbled some words around the crossword. They exchanged the pen a few more times. Still, the boxes stayed unfilled.

Just then a bus stopped. Johnny said, “This bus will take you to Alapuzha and you can catch a connecting bus to Angamali. It’s bursting… maybe you should take the next bus.”

I held my breath. A few more people pushed their way into the bus and it started to roll forward.

“You did the right thing, Sarah. I’m not sure you’d have been comfortable in that bus anyway,” Johnny said. “But, we should return your cousin home before people realise she’s missing.”

“I’m not going anywhere without Sarah chechi!”

“No-no. I wasn’t suggesting you leave Chechi’s side. Come on, Sarah, give me your bags. No one will know you were trying to disappear. We’ll figure out how to get your bags into the house without anyone seeing. Okay?” Johnny looked at her encouragingly, his hand held out for her knapsack. “You don’t have to do what you don’t want to. Okay?”

Sarah hesitated, but eventually handed her knapsack and holdall to Johnny. We walked back to the house slowly, with Johnny doing all the talking.

*Pavada is skirt in Malayalam

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This series is fictional and follows the narrator who is remembering events during a family vacation in Kerala during her childhood. Her cousin Sarah is being forced to meet a suitor and decides to run away. Read the entire The Webs We Weave series here FC 69, 70, 71, 72, 73, 74, 75, 76, 77, 78, 79, 80, 81, 82, 83, 84, 85, 86, 87, 88, 89, 90, 91, 92, 93, 94