Showing posts with label Mosquito. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mosquito. Show all posts

Friday, 5 June 2020

Fishy Chronicles 66: Lockdown Diaries: Of Just Desserts


The Covid-19 lockdown stretched our days and one day melded into the other, much like waves in the sea. There was no start and no end – just an indeterminate expanse.

Enforced confinement is an unusual state for all three of us. Anjali and I bickered often. Sometimes Genie would be irritated and disappear for long periods, which was a dampener.

A normal day involved housework, cooking, eating, some shouting, on a lucky day some swearing, on a good day lots of jokes and then the TV would come alive to drown out the noise. Most days it started with the news and then veered to the Fox Life channel and then we'd subside into our secret food hell. Genie and Anjali would often turn to me and say, "You've  got to cook that." 

Anjali had taken to joining me at the Gonsalves home, then we’d walk around our housing complex several times until Mr Duggal, the secretary of our housing society, alerted by the annoyed security guards, would ask us to get off the grounds and go home. As soon as we heard the loudspeaker being switched on and Mr Duggal clearing his throat for his big announcement cum name-shame business, we disappeared. So when he did make his announcement, we were looking out of our sitting room window. Neighbours would come to their windows and see other walkers on the ground and, I assumed, wonder why Mr Duggal was making it personal by naming just us.

As in most apathetic Mumbai societies, no one stood up for us. But after the fourth time, Anjali suggested we write a formal letter of complaint to Peaceful Society committee, alleging harassment.

“What do you say, Genie?”

“Hmm.”

“Why is he targetting us when the garden is littered with walkers!” Anjali had a way with words. Littered was apt. Even if lockdown was in place, it meant nothing to Mumbaikars – especially in Peaceful Society. Apparently social distancing was for other people. When neighbours stopped to talk, they invaded our private space and, all too often, we found ourselves stepping back. Surely the deadly virus would overpower a weak mask and conquer all within droplet-catching distance.

Everything was due to the lockdown. We nagged Genie and our every waking moment was devoted to annoying him. He was our mouse and we were two cats arranged on either side of him. Genie ignored us totally, but still made us tea in the mornings and evenings and snacks.

“Do you have to let that awful thing drink out of your cup every day?” Anjali spluttered one morning when she saw my darling mosquito friend Norbert take the first sip of my morning tea, flavoured with lemon grass. I heard Nobby’s satisfied sigh. Yes, I nodded.

“Tell her the universe will not spin if I don’t,” Norbert said.

“The universe will not spin if he doesn’t drink from my cup,” I told Anjali absently, watching my friend fly off and sit on the fish tank.

“Bullshit. Plus, imagine all the disease in his proboscis.”

I imagined it. And let it go. Life was too short. It hadn’t killed me so far. Though I did not know what disease, if any, lurked in me. Norbert buzzed around me and settled on my ear. I shivered from the tickle. “Don’t listen to that silly girl.”

“Norbert is welcome to drink from my cup any time,” Genie gave us a killer grin. And suddenly Norbert was off and flying towards Genie. I saw him sit on Genie’s ear, whispering animatedly.

“Same thing. Disease,” Anjali grumbled. “Where is your electric fly swatter?”

Norbert jumped off and flew towards Anjali. “Nobby, no!” I shouted. He held still in midair and then flew back to Genie and hid in his hair.

“Tell your friend that was a close shave,” Nobby said. How easy it was to rile yoga-loving Nobby – wasn’t meditation supposed to calm the soul?

“Er, we don’t have a fly swatter,” I told Anjali.

                                                      **

This is a fictional series about the 30-something narrator, based in Mumbai. Her former pet fish and parents’ former man Friday have returned to stay indefinitely.

Lockdown Dairies revolve around the Covid-19 confinement. Time hangs heavy for the narrator... with many irritations.  

                                                     **                                                                             

"Why not?"

“We don’t have a mosquito problem,” I said waving my hands at the room. We had never had one after my acquaintance with Nobby and we were off limits to his friends.

“Bullshit.”

“Have you been bitten while you’ve been here? Ever?”

“Er, not that I can think of. But I’ve seen swarms of mosquitos outside. It won’t hurt to keep an electric bat handy. What if those guys get in?”

“They won’t.”

“How can you be sure.”

“Have they bitten you while we’ve walked about… even at night?” Anjali was silent. “That’s Nobby’s doing.”

“Bullshit. I wear Odomos.”

“I don’t and I’ve never been bitten… at least in this society.”

“Sorry, my darling, I can only manage the guys in my territory. Can’t do a thing when you go outside Peaceful Society, you know that,” Nobby said, sounding upset.

“Of course I know that, my sweet yoga-boy,” I said to Genie’s ear. I suddenly knew what I was going to cook for breakfast. I looked at Genie. He had had a bath, and his hair was wet. He still wouldn’t say where he went every morning. I looked out of the window and took a deep breath to quell my irritation. Some ladies in the building opposite ours were watching. I went to the window and closed the thin curtains.

“You're shutting out the light. Leave the curtains alone,” Genie ordered.  

“Er, there are some girls in Wing E watching us.”

“Some guys too. Open the curtains.”

I pushed the curtains apart slowly, looking out curiously. One topless married guy looked away. But Mrs Bakshi and her daughter from the eighth floor and the paying guest girls on the sixth looked on unabashedly.

“Some would say it is tit-for-tat,” Genie said coming up behind me, amusement in his voice and nodding vigourously at the overjoyed women.

“Why tit-for-tat?”

“Ask your binoculars.”

I felt chastened. Embarrassed by my activities of the past few weeks. “Karma is probably the word to use,” I mumbled.

“Just desserts. Tit-for-tat. Karma. Same thing.”

                                                          **

Sunday, 9 December 2018

Fishy Chronicles 8: Mousetrap, The Play

Ticket for the play (Photo by A. Peter)
Weeks ago, soon after our supposed rapprochement, Fish called me to say they wanted to go for a play.

“It’s only the best and longest running ever!” Dimitri said.

“So I’ve heard. Tickets probably all sold out. Besides, they play only in London.” That wasn't true. The entire troupe would be in Mumbai soon, with Agatha monitoring them from above.

There was silence at the other end. I asked, “Are you lovelies gnashing your itsy bitsy teeth? The play is only for hoity toity SoBo Mumbaikars.”

“Or just discerning theatre lovers. You selectively forgot them.”

“Indeedy, I did.”

“Well?” Portas came on the line. He was a muscled fish that I had rescued from a public acquarium. Fish had told me he was in danger of dying and we had mounted a kidnap plan. Turned out Portas was an old buddy of theirs and I had needlessly perpetrated a crime.

“Well, what?” I said.

“Would you like to go with us?”

“Really?” I was thrilled. I hadn’t been able to get anyone to go with me... and then I saw how much the tickets cost. The cheapest had been sold out.

“Yes. We thought it’d be good to enjoy a day out. What say?”

“Yes.”

****** 

Fish took care of the logistics.

Apparently Garl, their current benefactor, had had a word with someone at the theatre and we were allowed in without a fuss. Plus, said benefactor had organised the best seats in the house. We sat a seat away from Simone Tata.

“You don’t want to sit right next to the big bigshots,” Gregory whispered when I hefted the tank into the seat next to mine. I needn’t have worried. No one gave us a second look. Apparently it is de rigeur for fish and mosquitos to attend plays.

“Did you know that the first play was staged in 1952 and had Richard Attenborough in the main role?” Dimitri splashed a little water at me to catch my attention. There were many famous people in the theatre. But I thought I saw Genie too.

“You’re imagining things. He's enjoying winter in Yorkshire,” Gregory said, staring in the direction I was. “Besides, he would have told us.”

“He likes to wear flimsy clothes, remember?Yorkshire would be too cold for him.” That wasn't quite true. Genie loved winters, and the colder it was the better. I’d seen him wear a threadbare muffler, a thin t-shirt and march into the snow in Kashmir. I thought he was the original stud. And unattainable. And considering he had money, I didn’t understand why he didn’t wear better clothes.

Norbert buzzed around me. “Please don’t bite anyone, Nobby. You may get hurt. I may get thrown out if I attempt to find you in a darkened hall.”

“Relax, my darling. It was an excellent idea having my dinner here. What exotic fare to be had. For sure, my nourishment will be top notch. Wheeee!” Nobby screamed in my ear and disappeared. My heart palpitated and the play started.

Fish fidgeted. They whispered and fussed and jostled each other for a better view. And then settled down. We discussed it and couldn’t remember if we’d read this book. Was it a book at all?

“No,” Gregory said, “It’s a play. And it’s not been published or the end is supposed to be hush hush, or some such. The worst part is that Wikipedia gives away the plot entirely, even though the cast will ask the audience to keep the end a secret.”

“You know the end?”

Gregory looked sheepish. “I read up on the play. Didn't want to come unprepared.”

“You should chill, Greg. It’s okay if you don’t read the review and plot beforehand.”

Gregory gasped. “Heresy!”

“In fact you should ask if you can replace any of the cast when they’re ill or want a break. You’d do well. You'd love it.”

Fish turned their backs on me. But I was not troubled at all. The play picked up speed and I nudged the fish tank. “You're missing stuff. Watch the play!”

Soon we were standing and clapping. Fish tossed water about and screamed and whistled and people glared at us.

When the crowd started moving towards the exit, I waved at a couple of people I knew, but suddenly I saw Nobby flying towards me. “Run, run, run!” he screamed into my ear and hid in my collar.

I quickly got the Fish into my pushcart and charged out. We shoved a youngster out of the way and almost crashed down the stairs. An older man grabbed the tank and held it steady. I yelled a thankyou at him and ran down the narrow path until I saw a small corner hidden from view.

We waited till the crowd thinned – but not before I saw my ex and his wife. I dragged in my breath and tried to slow my heart.

When we were seated on Marine Drive, I asked Nobby what happened.

“I was having a good meal and kept getting swatted about. I heard someone call for an usher -- complaining that there were mosquitos -- and then I saw Rohit and his latest squeeze.”

“They’re married now,” I mumbled, the familiar feelings of rejection and humiliation bubbling up. Rohit Chawla had been my boyfriend for many years until one day he moved out and took up with Nikita. I realised later that much planning had gone into it.

I shook the hopeless thoughts away. “So what happened, Nobby?”

“I bit ever inch of his bare flesh and of that she devil!”

I stared at my little friend – he looked defiant and angry. He had the biggest, bravest, most loving heart in the world beating in his tiny body.

I tried to find words. Finally I heard Dimitri clear his throat, “Rohit deserved it. You did good, Nobby!” And with that Fish somersaulted in their tank and laughed. They popped out of the tank and blew raspberries at every Rohit Chawla lookalike walking by the sea in the dimming evening light.

Suddenly things felt good. Nobby cuddled my neck and we let the cool, strong, smelly wind of the Arabian Sea wash over us. Yes, I was definitely looking forward to the next few weeks.