Showing posts with label Meditation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Meditation. Show all posts

Friday, 5 June 2020

Fishy Chronicles 66: Lockdown Diaries: Of Just Desserts


The Covid-19 lockdown stretched our days and one day melded into the other, much like waves in the sea. There was no start and no end – just an indeterminate expanse.

Enforced confinement is an unusual state for all three of us. Anjali and I bickered often. Sometimes Genie would be irritated and disappear for long periods, which was a dampener.

A normal day involved housework, cooking, eating, some shouting, on a lucky day some swearing, on a good day lots of jokes and then the TV would come alive to drown out the noise. Most days it started with the news and then veered to the Fox Life channel and then we'd subside into our secret food hell. Genie and Anjali would often turn to me and say, "You've  got to cook that." 

Anjali had taken to joining me at the Gonsalves home, then we’d walk around our housing complex several times until Mr Duggal, the secretary of our housing society, alerted by the annoyed security guards, would ask us to get off the grounds and go home. As soon as we heard the loudspeaker being switched on and Mr Duggal clearing his throat for his big announcement cum name-shame business, we disappeared. So when he did make his announcement, we were looking out of our sitting room window. Neighbours would come to their windows and see other walkers on the ground and, I assumed, wonder why Mr Duggal was making it personal by naming just us.

As in most apathetic Mumbai societies, no one stood up for us. But after the fourth time, Anjali suggested we write a formal letter of complaint to Peaceful Society committee, alleging harassment.

“What do you say, Genie?”

“Hmm.”

“Why is he targetting us when the garden is littered with walkers!” Anjali had a way with words. Littered was apt. Even if lockdown was in place, it meant nothing to Mumbaikars – especially in Peaceful Society. Apparently social distancing was for other people. When neighbours stopped to talk, they invaded our private space and, all too often, we found ourselves stepping back. Surely the deadly virus would overpower a weak mask and conquer all within droplet-catching distance.

Everything was due to the lockdown. We nagged Genie and our every waking moment was devoted to annoying him. He was our mouse and we were two cats arranged on either side of him. Genie ignored us totally, but still made us tea in the mornings and evenings and snacks.

“Do you have to let that awful thing drink out of your cup every day?” Anjali spluttered one morning when she saw my darling mosquito friend Norbert take the first sip of my morning tea, flavoured with lemon grass. I heard Nobby’s satisfied sigh. Yes, I nodded.

“Tell her the universe will not spin if I don’t,” Norbert said.

“The universe will not spin if he doesn’t drink from my cup,” I told Anjali absently, watching my friend fly off and sit on the fish tank.

“Bullshit. Plus, imagine all the disease in his proboscis.”

I imagined it. And let it go. Life was too short. It hadn’t killed me so far. Though I did not know what disease, if any, lurked in me. Norbert buzzed around me and settled on my ear. I shivered from the tickle. “Don’t listen to that silly girl.”

“Norbert is welcome to drink from my cup any time,” Genie gave us a killer grin. And suddenly Norbert was off and flying towards Genie. I saw him sit on Genie’s ear, whispering animatedly.

“Same thing. Disease,” Anjali grumbled. “Where is your electric fly swatter?”

Norbert jumped off and flew towards Anjali. “Nobby, no!” I shouted. He held still in midair and then flew back to Genie and hid in his hair.

“Tell your friend that was a close shave,” Nobby said. How easy it was to rile yoga-loving Nobby – wasn’t meditation supposed to calm the soul?

“Er, we don’t have a fly swatter,” I told Anjali.

                                                      **

This is a fictional series about the 30-something narrator, based in Mumbai. Her former pet fish and parents’ former man Friday have returned to stay indefinitely.

Lockdown Dairies revolve around the Covid-19 confinement. Time hangs heavy for the narrator... with many irritations.  

                                                     **                                                                             

"Why not?"

“We don’t have a mosquito problem,” I said waving my hands at the room. We had never had one after my acquaintance with Nobby and we were off limits to his friends.

“Bullshit.”

“Have you been bitten while you’ve been here? Ever?”

“Er, not that I can think of. But I’ve seen swarms of mosquitos outside. It won’t hurt to keep an electric bat handy. What if those guys get in?”

“They won’t.”

“How can you be sure.”

“Have they bitten you while we’ve walked about… even at night?” Anjali was silent. “That’s Nobby’s doing.”

“Bullshit. I wear Odomos.”

“I don’t and I’ve never been bitten… at least in this society.”

“Sorry, my darling, I can only manage the guys in my territory. Can’t do a thing when you go outside Peaceful Society, you know that,” Nobby said, sounding upset.

“Of course I know that, my sweet yoga-boy,” I said to Genie’s ear. I suddenly knew what I was going to cook for breakfast. I looked at Genie. He had had a bath, and his hair was wet. He still wouldn’t say where he went every morning. I looked out of the window and took a deep breath to quell my irritation. Some ladies in the building opposite ours were watching. I went to the window and closed the thin curtains.

“You're shutting out the light. Leave the curtains alone,” Genie ordered.  

“Er, there are some girls in Wing E watching us.”

“Some guys too. Open the curtains.”

I pushed the curtains apart slowly, looking out curiously. One topless married guy looked away. But Mrs Bakshi and her daughter from the eighth floor and the paying guest girls on the sixth looked on unabashedly.

“Some would say it is tit-for-tat,” Genie said coming up behind me, amusement in his voice and nodding vigourously at the overjoyed women.

“Why tit-for-tat?”

“Ask your binoculars.”

I felt chastened. Embarrassed by my activities of the past few weeks. “Karma is probably the word to use,” I mumbled.

“Just desserts. Tit-for-tat. Karma. Same thing.”

                                                          **

Wednesday, 17 April 2019

Fishy Chronicles 18: When Mount Kailash Beckons

Who is calling you, Genie? Why don't you pick up the damn phone?”

He looked at the screen with distaste and lobbed the phone at me. I scrambled to catch it and switched it on angrily.

Too late. I stared at Genie in shock. He was sitting on the floor, stretched out, his back against a wall, his long legs in front of him and a broad smile was forming.

“W-w-what, Zeba? What was that?” She had never spoken to me in such honeyed tones. What did I do to deserve it.

You! You!” she choked.

“Who did you think it was? Genie?” I winked at Fish. Just before Ms Z called, Genie and I had been watching Fish and Donny swim in the tub. Now they were hanging on to its rim, all ears. Or gills. Or whatever.

“What are you doing with his phone?” Zeba demanded.

“He gave it to me.”

There was silence, a shrill groan of some sort and then, like molasses, “Where is he, darling?”

“Travelling, I think.”

“You think? Where?!

“Genie told me not to tell. He said there were strange people calling him.”

“Does he have your phone?”

“No.”

“How are you contacting him?”

“I’m not.”

“Rubbish! You two are joined at the hips!”

“I assure you we are not. Mobility would be an issue. You want me to pass on a message?”

My laughing Genie suddenly sat up straight and glared. He made slicing movements against his throat with his index finger. Hah! Like I was scared.

“He's talking about himself, you dope,” Gregory said scornfully.

“That means you know where he is!” Zeba continued angrily from Peaceful Society, Mumbai. India right now was not far enough for me.

“Yes. He's gone to Greenland... to meditate...”

“That's utter crap!”

“... something about perpetual darkness and beautiful ice maidens dancing under the Northern Lights. He sounded off. Too much meditation or the cold getting to his head maybe.”

I heard a scream and then the line got cut.

“Well?” I smiled at Genie. “What do you think?”

“The true test will be whether Zebby comes back for more.”

                                     ****** 
This is a fictional series surrounding the narrator, a divorcée who lives in the distant suburbs of Mumbai, Genie, her ex manservant, a former underworld don turned world traveller, and a school of vocal, irascible fish. They are currently travelling around Cambodia but have been tracked down by a neighbour, Zeba Bobby, who is nursing a huge crush on Genie.

                                      ****** 

We were having tea with Genie's friends on the terrace of our service apartment in Phnom Penh, Cambodia, when his phone interrupted the camaraderie resulting from a beautiful sunset, snacks and tea-induced gup-shup.

Genie silenced his phone and slipped it back into his pocket. It rang several times more, eventually silencing us all. Genie switched it on but didn’t talk. He listened for a few minutes and his mouth tightened. He cut the call.

Sunset, friends, tea, snacks and gup-shup.
(Photos: A. Peter)

He did this several times and then caught sight of me looking at him. A faint smile appeared on his mouth. The phone rang again.

“Your turn, darling.” He slid his phone on the table towards me.

I took the phone reluctantly, involuntarily  remembering Zeba's last call. I stared at the number on the phone's screen. It said Peaceful Lech – Genie's moniker for Mr Duggal, Peaceful Society's Committee Secretary. Zeba was Peaceful Witch. Strangely, in this respect, Genie and I were similar. Zeba was simply Bitch on my phone list and Duggal SickSexPest.

“Hello?” I said nervously. I absolutely hated this Peaceful Society man with his many complaints.

“Where are you?” Mr Duggal demanded.

“Why?”

“It's important the committee knows!”

“Why?”

Because... because... because it is best practice!”

“For what?”

“You don’t have a family. We need to know if something happens to you.”

It was too funny.

“Why are you laughing! I tried your number, it’s switched off. Then I tried Genie's number and after many tries you picked up! Are you on a holiday together?”

That question again. He might have said ‘are you having an affair’ with him. Dirty-minded pig.

I said, “Last year when Mr Roy died in his flat, we didn't know for more than a month. And only because the kachdawali raised a stink about the smell from his doorway. No pun intended.”

I heard sputtering noises. “Besides,” I continued, “This invasive practice of knowing members' travel plans has to be made a Society regulation and not turned into a means for the Society’s committee to harass single members!”

“But, but, but, it’s for your own good!”

“How?”

“Er...”

“No problem, Mr Duggal, next time I’ll inform your wife of my whereabouts.” Mrs Duggal was a suspicious, jealous woman who hated all the single women and any beautiful woman in Peaceful Society or even outside its walls. I suspect she turned that way because of her spouse's extraordinary ability to swivel his head 360 degrees at the sight of the opposite sex.

“No. No. Noooo. No. No need!” he almost shouted.

“I think I’d trust Mrs Duggal with that information. I’d be sure it wasn’t shared, that I wouldn't be the butt of a joke by some dirty old men. Plus she’d probably look out for me better.”

I could hear an argument in the background. Several phone buttons got pushed and the line got disconnected. It had sounded like people arguing in the background and a scuffle for the phone.

The Peaceful Lech called immediately. I took my time answering it. I counted nine rings and finally picked up.

“Where is Genie? Where have the two of you disappeared to!” Zeba said aggressively.

Shit. It was all Zeba's doing. And I was nonplussed. Why the interest? But apparently I stayed too quiet for too long because suddenly she screamed, “Are you there? What are you doing with Genie?

I stayed quiet until I mastered my emotions. I had to think of our friends too.

“Right now?” I asked unnecessarily.

YES!

“Are you sure you want to know? What did you say, Zeba? Really? It sounded like a cuss word. I don’t think you'll be able to handle what you hear.”

“Are you with Genie?!”

“You saw us leave home together. In any case why should it matter? In soul and spirit we are,” I heard giggles and a snort. I couldn’t look at the others. I needed to do this straightfaced. “Where his body goes, my soul wafts along. When he meditates, my mind immediately scouts for comfortable spots on Mount Kailash...”

“Shut up!”

Aiyyo, Zeba, don’t be like this. I told you he’s left me his phone because mine doesn’t work. Plus meditation is required without phones. And where he is, he needn’t bother with connectivity.”

“Er, where’s that,” Zeba asked hopefully.

“He said he wanted peace...”

“Yes, he likes his solit...”

“... nirvana...”

“Yes, yes...”

“... no drama...”

“Whe...”

“... some place without me.”

“Where would that be?”

“At home. Reading the newspaper in peace, I imagine.”

I gently disconnected the call and put Peaceful Lech and Peaceful Witch’s phone numbers on Genie's auto-reject list.

I grinned at Genie and handed him his phone. “Buys you time until you come face to face with Lech and Witch. By the way, nice names both. Suits them brilliantly.”

                                    ******